This summer I fought as hard as I could to get you half of the time but I lost. I left to the West to find a job, build a little place and then bring you out here with your sisters. I weighed all my options, I counted the costs and I drove West. I think you will understand and there are many dads in my shoes that understand. When having you partially in a place I do not want to be is one choice and having you partially in a place I’ve dreamed of being is the other choice I choose the second. I figure you will love Bend, that you will love the West and all that it has to offer. Someday soon, a person will discover a gene that causes someone to long to be nomadic and long for the mountains and the oceans. This gene will cause a person to always be exploring and finding and searching. I have this gene and I won’t be surprised if you and your sisters do, as well. It is a fun gene to have. It must be heeded or it just festers. It must be followed or a person just stagnates and gets despondent.
I was able to FaceTime with you quite a bit and we maintained our happiness together. I ate with you. I read with you. I put you to bed. Now, I am on my way to see you. I can’t wait to hug you and hold you. I want to take you home with me. That way, we can live together, father and son. I want to take your sisters with us, too. That way, we can all live together as a family.
I’ve found that what I want and what I’ve received are very different things. As you get older you will learn that the grace is in the latter.
I love you and long to see you each day.